John McClendon: Focal Point

George Washingtons 110 Rules of Civility

7:30 AM

As we celebrate the birth of our country while facing what could be tumultuous times, we might want to check out George Washington's 110 Rules of Civility. We might even learn something about the discipline required to live a life that is ordered by rules, especially those we should be learning from God's Word.

According to an article from Nashville Public Radio (NPR) entitled, George Washington's Rules of Civility, George was a young schoolboy in Virginia when he copied out by hand a list of 110 "Rules of civility & decent Behavior in Company and Conversation." They were originally thought to have been written by French Jesuit priests n the 16th-century. He not only wrote out each one but committed them to memory. The rules addressed etiquette, moral issues, and character.

Here is just a taste of the rules he learned. You might find some a little humorous!

Rule #1 - Every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those that are present.
Rule #6 - Sleep not when others speak, sit not when others stand, speak not when you should hold your peace, walk not on when others stop.
Rule #10 - When you sit down, keep your feet firm and even, without putting one on the other or crossing them.
Rule #11 - Shift not yourself in the sight of others nor gnaw your nails.
Rule #22 - Show not yourself glad at the misfortune of another, though he were your enemy.
Rule #30 - In walking, the highest place in most countries seems to be on the right hand, therefore, place yourself on the left of him whom you desire to honor, but if three walk together, the mid place is the most honorable; the wall is usually given to the most worthy if two walk together.
Rule #40 - Strive not with your superiors in argument, but always submit your judgement to others with modesty.
Rule #56 - Associate yourself with men of good quality, if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company.
Rule #71 - Gaze not on the marks or blemishes of others and ask not how they came.
Rule #73 - Think before you speak; pronounce not imperfectly nor bring out your words too hastily, but orderly & distinctly.
Rule #91 - Make no show of taking great delight in your victuals; feed not with greediness; cut your bread with a knife; lean not on the table; neither find fault with what you eat.
Rule #108 - When you speak of God or his attributes, let it be seriously & with reverence. Honor & obey your natural parents although they be poor.
Rule #109 - Let your recreations be manful not sinful.
Rule #110 - Labor to keep alive in your breast that little celestial fire called conscience.

Check out the complete list. We might all do well to memorize them too.

Focal Point

Teaching and Prayer Leads to Transformation

6:30 AM

Focal Point

Striking Out With Guests

6:30 AM

Striking out is never fun. When we watched our two boys play little league baseball, it was always heartbreaking to see them strike out. What's even more heartbreaking is when a church is striking out with guests. I recently read an article that reminded me of the importance of continually thinking about how we treat guests.

As I read pastor David Tarkington's article, A Swing and a Miss . . . When Your Church Strikes Out with Guests, I felt compelled to evaluate whether my church was striking out with guests. Maybe his story will help you as well:

I received an email this morning from a family that visited with our church for the first time (and possibly the last time) yesterday. I responded with great appreciation for the honesty and asked permission to share this information with our Leadership Team and church membership to help us understand the value of first impressions. I was given permission, but have changed the name in the email because it seemed like the right thing to do.

Dear Sirs,

My wife and I attended your church for the first time this past Sunday. Our intent was to attend the 9:15am service. We wandered into the main sanctuary. The worship team was on stage. We picked a seat and sat down. We were the only ones in the pews. Obviously we felt odd. No one approached us to redirect us to the gym for the service. (Our 9:15am service is more contemporary in worship style, and meets in our Family Ministry Center/Gym. - DT) Two friends of ours who were also attending for the first time asked a man with a name badge what we should do. He explained that the 9:15 was held in the gym and pointed to it's location. He did not offer to take us there. Needless to say we wandered a bit until we found the gym. No one from the church greeted us. No one said "hello" or "welcome." We were handed a packet when we entered the gym. That was the only contact we had with any staff or volunteer servants. We stayed for the entire service and were rushed out afterwards to facilitate the next event in the gym. My wife and I are not baby Christians. We are searching for a church home that follows the Word without compromise. I really thought that your church was it. Sadly, we will not be returning. No one welcomed us. We felt like we were NOT welcome there...

I was heart-broken and frustrated when I read this email. Not because Steve would dare send it. I greatly appreciate the fact that he did. I am not really mad at those who missed opportunities. I am, however, frustrated because I know we know better. We know that guests do not intuitively know where to go on our campus (which is a maze, to say the least) and that missed opportunities remain missed opportunities.

Don't misread here; we do have a friendly church. There is great love here and people who would (and have) done anything for a brother or sister. This church has stepped out of our comfort zones over the years to strategically engage our community. Yet, even with great intentions and strides taken, we miss at times. And those misses hurt.

Why is it a constant challenge? Because we (and I do mean we, not just others in the church) get busy, have our routines, go to our classes, sit by our friends, and forget that just calling ourselves "family" doesn't mean we are.

I don't know if Steve and his wife will come back. I hope they do. Fortunately, they are believers and so we didn't create a barrier to their salvation. But...what if they weren't believers? What if this was the first time they attended church ever and only did so because of a family crisis, or because after years of being prompted by the Holy Spirit, they said "yes."

No one wants to go to a church where they feel unwelcome or ignored. That storyline is played out and that must change, not just here...but in all churches seeking to engage a lost world for the sake of the Gospel.

I pray Pastor David's story will remind us all of the importance of building authentic relationships, not only with guests, but with new members as well. People are looking for friendly churches; they are looking for friends.

May we take on the Apostle Paul's challenge in Romans 12:10, "Show family affection to one another with brotherly love. Outdo one another in showing honor."

Read Pastor David's complete article: A Swing and a Miss...When Your Church Strikes Out with Guests - davidtarkington.com

Focal Point

Political Propaganda, Rhetoric and Manipulation

5:30 AM

The presidential decision our country is going to make over the next several months will impact generations to come, probably more than ever before in the history of our nation. As believers we have a responsibility to respond to this presidential election cycle with wisdom and grace. This is why we need to be discerning when it comes to political propaganda, rhetoric, and manipulation that will take place during the coming months.

While the Apostle Paul was giving wisdom about another subject, we should wisely heed his wisdom as we go through these coming months; Brothers, don't be childish in your thinking, but be infants in evil and adult in your thinking. (1 Corinthians 14:20, HCSB) Here are some thoughts on how we can apply these verses to this election cycle:

Don't act childish on social media. We need to be discerning and share wisdom, but we can't act childish when sharing our thoughts. Verify what you read from others before sharing. Don't tear down an individual or his or her family; rise above these tactics. Don't engage in fruitless arguments. Share thoughts and others ideas that will help everyone make better choices.
Remain true to Christian biblical values. Yes, our Christian beliefs should be reflected in our decision making. We can't separate what we believe from how we live as we make decisions.
Gather your facts about each candidate, pray, and seek wise counsel.
Listen carefully to each candidate's message. Be aware that each candidate is using tactics to condition you to his or her platform. Sometimes the message is designed as propaganda targeted at manipulating your emotions and conditioning your thinking. Don't allow yourself to be drawn in by these tactics.
Filter everything you hear from the press and other media outlets. We may think that the press is neutral, but most aren't. Many have become political propaganda machines whose goal is to direct your decision-making. For example, the media is now calling what once was viewed as liberal thought as progressive thought. They are communicating that everyone else isn't progressive, including those with conservative views. In another instance, I watched as post-debate news broadcasters basically told viewers who they should vote for based on their analysis of the candidate's debate performance. Watch each interview very carefully. Look to see what they are trying to communicate to you. Don't let anyone condition your thinking.

What should you look for in a candidate? Here are my thoughts at this point. I am sure you can think of others as well.

Integrity - Is the candidate honest and possessive of strong moral principles based on Judaeo-Christian beliefs? How does he respond to criticism and accusations?
Responsibility - Does the candidate express a feeling of obligation to care and protect the citizens of this country? Does he express a sense of responsibility, not only to the people, but to uphold the values and system of government that has made this country great?
Leadership - Will people follow the candidate? Does he possess the skills to gather a strong team of leaders? Does he express a sense of mission? Can he make solid and sound decisions and live by the results? How does he respond to critics?
Motive - What is the candidate's goal for being president? Does his goal seem to be self-serving? Listen carefully for motives because this will determine how the United States will look after this candidate leaves office. A narcissistic leader will polarize or destroy any organization or, in this case, country.

As we enter this stretch of the presidential electoral process let's prayerfully ask God to give us wisdom; for we know that, if any of you lack wisdom, he should ask God, who gives to all generously and without criticizing (James 1:5, HCSB), and might I add, without manipulating you!